I’m no expert on relationships and stuff, but I’m willing to guess one of the biggest problems facing young people is marriage…and about getting married.
Now when I talk about stuff like this to my friends however, one of the statements that drive me up a wall is:
“Marriage? Are you crazy; I’m just 25 now!”
…as if it were illegal to get married before you were 30 or something.
Of course, some of my other friends think on a different line, which goes something like,
“What’s the hurry? Why can’t you wait till you’re more mature – after all this is a huge step.”
Which makes me think…its okay to have a boyfriend-girlfriend thing going on; make out on college campuses, watch less-than-family-flicks in shady dark dormitories, try to make a pass with the waitresses at the café and try to hit on the new recruits at work…but its not okay to get married?
There’s something seriously wrong with the whole system here!
Let’s be honest here; boys and girls start wondering about each other all along ever since you hit like 13 or so; and there’s nothing to lie about here – physical attraction is one of the most instinctive of instincts; and part of what makes us human.
So where’s the problem here?
The problem lies with the fact that people go on with their instincts and follow the signs alright – except that they don’t wanna commit on a relationship and call it marriage because of the bundle of responsibilities that come with the package.
Why?
Because of the safety margin that leaves room for error – boyfriends to dump; that cute girl in the next office to look at, the date you went on and later decided she’s not your type…the endless possibilities.
Now the trouble is, even after people do find their type, they future-plan their marriage to say like three years from now…because it leaves space to get ‘settled’ before getting married.
I’m really not aware of any rule that states you WILL settle when you hit 29 but what this really shows is the lack of Tak’wah and the fact that all provisions come from Allah. If you get that point straight, you’re on the right track.
Otherwise, if you’re 29 and not yet settled, the only driving force is the desperation when you know its already too late wait any longer.
So the big question is: what do I do?
Simple. Trust your heart…and not the reasons that everyone else throws at you.
And when you know you need to get married, pray, and just do it!
